Anyway up and onwards.
By false advertising I am of course referring to anything that even when you are sober, can make a whale look like a supermodel and the way in which governments seem to be a multiple choice guess work democracy.
This is Raging Horses plea to all other members to vote him in to power. I promise the homeless problem will no longer be a problem, as all will be offered a free trip to Australia to mark the anniversary of the grand export service we provided them in centuries gone by.
The Aged will no longer be a problem, as all will be expected to take up the offer of a free boat trip to Iran for all their good service to Britain-this applies to all over 75's.
Also fat or "Big Boned" people will no longer be a problem due to my views below.
The following is taken from a speech by Raging Horse to the head of fatlfly weightsavers:
"If it’s not a well adjusted mirror, girdle or a tent like baggy dress, its an even fatter person making her the best of two evils. Yes my friends, anyone that’s ever had a Stella too many or understands the Lyrics to Whole Lotta Rosie, I feel your pain.
Why can they not do something useful, the rolls could provide extra cup holders in a car, or a bouncy jabba castle for the littlens in the park, or our representative to the USA to make them feel more at home talking to their own kind.
Anyone that’s ever passed one in the street by dodging oncoming cars off the pavement knows that on a very very bad day under the influence of pear pressure by Mr Smirnoff and team Baileys, you would take up national service and take one for the team."
I also expect as a result of the early improvements to reduce unemployment, pension problems and improve the National Health Service.
All Public transport will be increased and improved upon by employing trained monkeys, badgers or polish, thereby reducing the costs involved.
Here goes- vote for Raging horse:
1. Keep the herd off the streets.
2. All old people are to take swimming lessons in the middle of the North Sea over the age of 75, or inspect Britain’s overcrowded landfills.
3. All scallies to be sent to America to improve the USA's intellect.
4. All Dogs, Cats, Rats, Mice and children to be kept on leads at all times.
5. All pubs should expect to drown in clouds of smoke-and should enjoy it as well!
6. All the male population should learn how not to cook clean and iron to give them an excuse in latter life.
7. All aged individuals should receive a free boating trip to Iran as a thank you for their service to Britain.
I could go on
Anyway I Won’t
See ya
Raging Horse
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