So let me give you a basic background to my very successful system. I call it "the chance relocation of displaced assets".
This simple system involves walking around with your neck tilted at a 125 degree angle so that you can survey the linear plane upon which you walk. Once you happen to come across some money lying on the ground all you have to do is bend over and pick it up.
Yes! It really is that simple
Once you have spent a couple of days honing your technique, you may have relised that the big money will never be made just randomly walking about. That is where the "advanced techniques" come into play.
It all hinges around a top secret government patented highly scientific formula, which I can reveal to you for the first time as
Chance of money found = Population density x Time spent looking
It all seems too simple once we have that piece of information, but as many of you, like myself, will have spent hours looking through the dense growth of the countryside and to not get anything except trench foot, nettle stings and badly infected badger bites. Now you can start making some serious money.
In my book it details many advanced techniques to maximize your profits by searching the coin slots of vending machines and payphones and waiting outside the local newsagents for when people throw away the small change after buying their paper.
Soon, after making a modest amount of money you may feel like you want to expand your business. This is where we use a relatively unknown business technique known as "tetrahedron selling". This involves taking your area and dividing it up into smaller areas and renting out the space to other "urban currency miners" in exchange for a mere 20% of their annual income. Once rented out these noble urban currency miners can rent out sections of their area using the same system, to other people using the same system all the way down the line! Potentially maximizing your profits and allowing you the time and the money to scope out new areas in which to apply your newfound business techniques.
If you feel you can’t wait much longer before you make your first million then there is a simple, relatively unknown way to double your money quickly... No its not prostitution, but it's just as easy. You can make a fortune just lying on your back and watching the money roll in!! It all hinges around a business contact I made over the internet years ago. At first I was a bit skeptical, but after reading his e-mail I knew this was a man I could do business with!!
"Good afternoon Madame. I is r Nigerian cowboy astronaught millionaire an am currently in the process of relocation to your fine proud and noble country state land. Unfortunately Due to a error in the customs and immigration laws my money has been falsely imprisoned and will not be released for another 5 weeks. If you could let me use your British bank account and the money contained within during this difficult time then I would b most grateful and would reward u handsomely for you're trust.
If you ar interested in this once in r lifetime offer please send me your account number, sort code and mothers maiden name and I will come meet you personally in 6 weeks and pay you back 4 times what you lent me!!
I lok backward to hereing from U
King Umbongo Babatundae jr"
A convincing letter I’m sure you'll agree, and the best part is, due to inner turmoil and splintered political leadership, Nigeria has almost 400 kings and 8000 members of royalty so you can just keep answering their call for help and exponentially increasing your money.
Just read the quotes from some of my many satisfied buyers.
"I was a little skeptical at first about how he managed to make so much money, but after buying the book I was convinced. Already I have 20 urban currency miners working for me and soon I plan to expand my operation into Birmingham city centre... Watch out world!!!!"
Washington Irving
"When I bought this book I was flat broke, but now I can afford all those holidays and new cars I always wanted and my life has never been better. I also just married Kelly brook and am seeing Kate moss on the side... Thanks Craig”
Michael Hunt
"My mechanical Badger is broken and I have no idea how to fix it!! Why do these terrible things always happen to me? Why did I lend my copy of Craig’s book to my friend"
Benjamin Dover
"I love you Craig, you shiny business god!!!"
Pamela Anderson
Buy "The Chance Relocation of Displaced Assets" By Craig DC now and you will receive a free copy of "Shaking Vending machines for sugary treats" and "Suing vending machine makers for horrific crushing injuries" absolutely free!!!.
Happy hunting my faithful business Adonis'.
Iron Fist
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